2 years of bad blogging

Wow we are at the two year mark and I have had nothing interesting or funny to blog about. I will have to put more effort into recognizing the funnier aspects of life. There has to be some when you have 4 hormonal teens living in your house. Right?Right?!!!!!!!

My ass re post

About a month ago I bought a bike. It's a beautiful, shiny red bike. It has big thick tires and front suspension, quick release tires and 21 one wonderfully easy to change gears. Built for comfort.

Yesterday the weather finally cleared enough for me to ride my bike for the first time. I bought my bike so I could ride it to work. I figured I had to do something after a full winter of sitting on my ass, eating bon bons and watching TV. Biking to work would be the perfect solution.
In a town full of the most wicked hills known to man I am fortunate to have a fairly flat route to work....so I thought.
It turns out that spending the winter...ok several winters and summers, sitting on your ass watching TV and eating bon bons is not the best training plan for bike riding.
But I digress.
Yesterday I woke up to the sound of birds singing and the much missed sun shining through my window.
Today is the day , I thought . Today I will ride my bike to work.
I set about my morning routine of coffee, shower and so on. Adding in some water consummation to ensure good hydration for my ride. I packed up my back pack with necessities and work clothes. Donned my shiny silver helmet and grabbed my bike lock.
Helmet and pack on, lock in hand I made my way to the shed where my pretty bike had been housed for the last month. I tripped over the lawn mower. Moved a big box of heavy stuff out of the way and proceeded to release my new ride from it's winter prison.
I walked it through the yard and up the steps to the porch. Then down the steps to the front door, which after many flights down would take me and my new baby to the flat street that we would take the few blocks to my office. Life was good. The sun shone down on us. Encouraging us to become one. Woman and bike together against the wind.
On the way down the stairs I banged my baby into the wall, became tangled in the empty 5 gallon water bottles waiting for the nice water guy to take them away and slipped on a piece of dryer lint slamming my shin into the peddle of my bike. In return my much loved bicycle hurled me down the stairs at an alarming rate making my heart thud rapidly in fear that I would die with out having left the porch.
At the bottom of the stairs we made up again and managed to make it all the way to the street with out incident.
I threw my leg over my bike and began to pedal. The wind was in my hair-well not all my hair- I was wearing my helmet which tends to get in the way of the wind through your hair feeling that made childhood bike riding so much fun.
The wind blew the sides of my hair. I picked up speed thanks to a small downward facing hill. It was exhilarating. Until I got to the bottom of the gentle slope. As we all know, what goes down must go up in the high paced world of bike riding. It was ok though, its just a little hill and I have these nifty one touch shifters. I played with the shifters.
Since this was the first time I had been on my bike I didn't really know how the gears worked. I ended up in low gear. It made the gentle slope feel like a mountain. I tried to gear up but by the time I figured it out I was peddling down hill at an alarming rate. In fact it felt as if I was not in gear at all. I looked down to make sure the chain hadn't fallen of.
It hadn't.
I got it back to a respectable gear just in time to hit an up hill slope. Sweat was pouring down my back and I was only a block from my house. Finally after many tortuously sloping hills I made to the flat heaven that is Baker street.
Two blocks down only three to go.
I was blessed with green lights all the way. Finally I got to the corner where I would turn to go to my office. I looked at the steep hill up to the parking garage and decided to ride 1 block farther and take the less challenging alley to the garage entrance. It was down hill right to the end so I had enough momentum to make it to the entrance. But some employee was in the garage so I had to keep riding up the slope that led to the bicycle cage. Couldn't let him think I was out of shape.
Like he couldn't tell from my wide ass hanging over the sides of my bicycle seat and all the sweat pouring down my red face!

Finally I made it to the top. Almost. So I stopped my wretched bike and swung my leg over to the ground, at which point both legs buckled. Not all the way. I didn't fall, but it was obvious to anyone watching that I had pushed myself to my physical limit.
I walked my bike to the bike cage and locked it up. My heavy breathing echoed against the concrete walls of the parking garage. I sat down to rest before taking the six stairs up to the door of my office. My hand shook as I tried to find the right key. Finally I made it through the door, down the hall and collapsed in complete exhaustion into my chair. Two hours later I was finally breathing properly and my face no longer looked like I had just run the Boston marathon in 3 hours and 10 minutes.
I was still alive.
Of course I still had to ride the damn thing home.
That, my friends, is tomorrows story!

My Ass part 2 re post

It's the end of the work day.
I consider walking home and leaving my red and silver torture device at work to rot for all eternity.
No my legs don't hurt.
My breathing has returned to a normal pace. I'm not really tired but I don't want to get on that ungodly contraption.
Being the "should-er" I am I talked myself into riding home.
I get changed out of my work clothes and into my riding clothes. I take the steps down to the parking garage. Un lock my bike and swing my leg over. As soon as my butt hits the seat I know this ride will not be comfortable. Not that the ride in was comfortable but my butt is screaming "NO DON'T PUT MY WIDE SELF ON THAT LITTLE TINY SEAT! PLEASE GOD NOOOOooooo."
I ignore my butt and begin to pedal home. The ride home is much easier ...Except for my screaming butt.
I thankfully hit every stop light which allows me to remove my butt from the seat for at least 10 seconds every light. When I come to the end of Baker street and all socially acceptable reasons to stop every block to remove my butt from the seat I begin talking to my butt. "It's only another couple of blocks" I say to my butt. "We made it this far we can make it to the end."
My butt is screaming "NO WE CAN'T. NOOOOOOOOooooo."
I stop, remembering my bottled water and suddenly feeling so thirsty that I must stop and have a drink. Another five seconds of relief.
I make it home in record time. Happy for every down hill coast which allows me to raise my butt off the seat for even a few seconds.
I reach the stairs declaring to my bike and my butt triumphantly that we made it, we are home!
The worst is over. My chair and my TV await at the top of the stairs.
I haul my bike up. Lock it against the rail and make my way up to my door.
I'm so happy to see my chair that tears sting my eyes. Yes I am home, no more pain for me. Just rest and relaxation.
Then I sit down.

My butt connects with the chair and screams out in shock. I scream along with it. What is going on? Why is there still pain? I am no longer on that red piece of crap. I am home on my familiar chair. The chair that has housed my butt for many a winter..and summer. What the hell is going on?
After two days of sitting on my pillow I am ready to try again.
Tomorrow I will ride my pretty red bike to work.
Just don't tell my butt, it will try to talk me out of it.

Full House

My house is full. I have teenagers bursting out at the seams. They are everywhere. SOMEBODY SAVE ME!!!!!!
It could be worse I suppose. I could live in the Big Brother House.

wow

spring is finally here! Thank the gods!

What are the main aspects

So what is life? What are all the broad descriptives that describe the various aspects of life?
You've got your health under which comes, physical, spiritual, emotional.
Finance; Career, spending, saving, planning, managing
Relationships; Family, friends, intimate

What else?
ahhh Creativity or does that come under spiritual health. Lets assume it does, so you've got your three main aspects of life under which fall categories that flush out the details a little further.
Life can be like a big org chart or for our purposes a work plan.
In essence Health is like one big category you have financial, emotional, spiritual and physical health. To take all that on at once is too huge but if you broke them all down and chose one thing at a time to work on you could achieve your goals. This year i want to work on my physical health but even that is huge. There is level of fitness, eating habits, bad habits like smoking. What about stress that effects physical health. Stress is caused often by the other health categories, unhealthy finances or relationships can cause extreme stress which lead to physical health problems. So maybe one needs to deal with some of that as well. But you have to start somewhere and I have two smaller goals that fall under health to work on over the next three months...and beyond of course because this is a lifestyle change. So I pick fitness and smoking. I believe that I can't effectively improve my health if I smoke and I can't effectively deal with stress unless I become physically active. Both of these smaller goals will impact the next steps I take in a life improvement plan that will last for years I expect. It's all about incorporating new and healthier habits into my life. My quit smoking date is Feb 19th. My goal for fitness is 3-4 times a week classes at the gym working up to six days a week alternating cardio, weights and classes. in three months I want to be smoke free and wearing a size 9 . Those are goals that are achievable

Life is a project

Today was the first day of a three day project management course I am taking through work. The homework looked daunting, so daunting in fact that I thought I was in over my head.
I planned to spend last weekend doing my daunting homework but instead spent it in my jammy's relaxing and napping. A rather boring weekend but a nice one. So yesterday morning I set about doing the homework that was due at noon. My Mom will laugh at this as I always do my homework this way. Last minute and in a panic. Worried that I am not getting it right and not really leaving myself enough time to make sure I'm doing it right. And as always I ended up doing it exactly right and it wasn't really that hard.
The homework was choose a project you are wanting to initiate, have already initiated or one you have worked on in the past. Identify the project and do a one page summary answering the following questions.
What is the current situation?
What are the desired outcomes?
How will you reach the desired outcomes?
That combined with the project management website we were to be come familiar with felt so out of my realm. Until i sat down to do it. It was easy and it was clear and it helped me to put the project into perspective. I loved it.
Today I realized I could apply that to my life as a whole and break it down into mini projects.

What is my current life situation? (The current realities)
What does my desired life look like? (What do I want)
How will I move from this reality to what i want? (The plan)

Ever changing life

I realized today that I don't know who I am. I've spent so many years identifying with my job and my role as a mother that now I don't know what I'm about. The job is still there and I will continue to advance and grow in that but with one child having graduated and moved on and the other having gone crazy and moved on I don't know what to do with myself. I find myself focusing all my non job related energy on my relationship. Noticing and obsessing on every nuance. Every missed phone call, every happy moment, every un said thought. It's not healthy and it's because I haven't filled the gap.
Knowing now that the gap must be filled I have no idea what I want to fill it with. I don't know who I am any more.
My mother warned me about this.
It's like a pre midlife crisis. It sucks.
It is a new year one filled with possibilities. I am my own woman again I just have to figure out what that looks like and I'll be fine.
I hope

Waiting

It seems like I'm always waiting.
Waiting till the kids grow up.
Waiting till I lose weight.
Waiting till life isn't so chaotic.
Waiting till I move.
Waiting till I feel better.
Waiting for David to get better.
Waiting till the new year.
Waiting for the weekend.
Waiting till February.
Waiting for spring.
Waiting till summer.
Waiting, Waiting, Waiting, Waiting, Waiting, Waiting.
I'm so tired of waiting for my life to begin.